Giving Children Choices Part Three

When I was raising my two boys, I was learning about giving choices.  One winter's day, we took a walk in Washington Crossing State Park.  It was here I decided to practice my new skill.

"OK, guys, we can take this trail or that trail. What's your choice?"

"Do you want to rest now, or shall we keep going?" 

"I have a snack; do you want an orange or an apple?"  

Sometimes they would ask me to do something.

"Can we go explore that area?"  

"Can we sit on the stone wall?"

In the last blog post, I talked about how giving children choices gives them some sense of power and control in their lives. Remember, children all day long are being told what to do. By providing children small choices in their lives, they feel that they have some say or some ability to make decisions independently. 

In this part, we continue to discuss two different “choices” methods, the “forced choice” and the “alternative choice.”

Image the daily life of a child.

"Elijah, you need to get up for school now.”

“Elijah, you need to brush your teeth now!”

“Elijah, stop yelling at your sister and get down here.”

“Elijah, do you have your bookbag?  Where is your homework?”

“Elijah, you need to hurry, or you will miss the bus."

When Elijah gets to school, it starts again.

"No running on the playground!”  

“Put your pencils away now.”

“No talking in the hallway."

"You are what you eat." You might have heard this phrase at some time in your life.   It comes from a French phrase from 1826, "Dis-moi ce que tu manges, je te dirai ce que tu es." [Tell me what you eat, and I will tell you what you are].  Slightly different, but you get the point. "You are what you eat" originated with an idea in Europe in 1800 that "the food one eats a bearing on one's state of mind and health." Well, people in 1800 were correct.  There is more and more evidence that food can have an impact on your mental health.

If you are looking for a quick mental health boost, researchers recommend getting outside.   They have shown that just being outside can help people feel more mentally healthy. It feels that science has caught up with what people already know: how many times have you, when you felt upset, just wanted to “get some fresh air.” Well, it turns out that it works.

There’s an intrinsic desire in all of us to be part of something bigger than ourselves. One of the best ways to do that is to be a volunteer. Growing up, service was seamlessly integrated into my life by my parents. Being of service to others and involved in my community, are core values that I’m lucky were passed down on both sides of my family.

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