While many of us attempt to achieve a healthy work-life balance, this can often seem like a goal that is all but attainable. Whether it be work or school related, or an event in our personal lives, we all face moments that leave a heap of stress upon us. And when searching for the answers as to how we got into this state of stress, we oftentimes place a great deal of focus on the problem itself. But what if we’ve got it all wrong?
In a recent study conducted by Michelle Gielan, a positive psychology researcher at the University of Pennsylvania, it was found that 91% of us could get better at dealing with stress. Through the study, it was also determined that it’s not so much why we worry that’s important; it’s how we respond to stimuli in the environment that matters.” In other words, we spend too much time harping on the problem itself, when we should be focusing on the response.
According to Gielan and her partners at Plasticity Labs, our responses typically fit along three dimensions:
- Cool under pressure. Are you calm and collected, giving your brain a chance to see a path forward, or is your mind filled with anxious, worried, and stressful thoughts that wear you out?
- Open communicator. Do you share your struggles with people in your life in a way that creates connections, or do you keep them to yourself and suffer in silence?
- Active problem solver. Do you face challenges head-on and make a plan, or do you deny the reality of what’s happening in your life and distract yourself?
By understanding these dimensions and our personal struggles with facing adversity, we can begin to adapt our thinking and behavior in a way that will allow us to respond better, while also paying less of an emotional toll after the stressful event comes to a conclusion.
Have you given thought to your current default response to stress? Research showed that most people fit into two stress response categories – Venters and Five-Alarmers.
Venters are particularly strong at being open communicators, as they are very keen on sharing the stressful events that they encounter in their lives. And while this is a good trait to have, Venters struggle in the other two dimensions, as they have difficulties with keeping a cool head under pressure and creating plans to address issues.
Five-Alarmers are very good communicators, as well. But where Venters lack the active problem-solving component, Five-Alarmers are able to take positive action in solving an issue. And while this may seem great, Five-Alarmers struggle in the sense that they “do not differentiate between low stresses and high stresses, instead responding to every stress as if it is a five-alarm fire,” which creates a huge emotional cost, as one could expect.
But while a majority of people fall into the aforementioned stress respondent categories, there is one more category that features a more adaptive response to stress, as Gielan explains. This group of Calm Responders, “rationally and calmly respond to challenges, test high on the three measures and generally enjoy the highest levels of happiness and success.”
Did you identify as a Venter or a Five-Alarmer? Would you like to get better at managing stress? The good news is that the three dimensions are flexible and can be changed if you place the right amount of focus on them.
As Michelle Gielan puts it, “Rewriting our response to stress can take time, but it is possible, and that effort can have a lasting effect on our success and happiness for the rest of our lives.”
Source Link: https://hbr.org/2017/01/you-can-improve-your-default-response-to-stress
